Alright so I figured since this topic keeps popping up in my DMs, might as well spill the beans on my own clumsy journey into giving head. Trust me, it wasn’t pretty at first. Buckle up.
The Dumb Panic Phase
Honestly? I just froze the first time it got real. Partner was super into it, lying there looking all expectant, and my brain went completely blank. Like that “forgot how to breathe” kinda blank. What the hell do I actually DO?
- First Mistake: Tried deepthroating immediately. Bad call. Felt like swallowing a damn fire hydrant. Coughing fit ruined the mood so hard.
- Second Mistake: Zero rhythm. Just kinda bobbed like a confused chicken. Partner gave me the “seriously?” look.
- Third Mistake: Teeth. God knows why I forgot lips exist. Got yelped at. Rightfully so.
The “Okay Maybe Research?” Phase
Got home, pride thoroughly bruised. Decided to actually, you know, prepare before wrecking someone’s night again. Didn’t wanna be that guy anymore.
Step 1 – Cleanliness Over Everything
This ain’t optional. Made damn sure everything was shower-fresh for both parties. Kept baby wipes and a towel nearby like a nervous Boy Scout. Nothing kills enthusiasm faster than funk.
Step 2 – Actually Paying Attention
Started slow next time. Paying attention to:
- The Head (that bit right at the top): Licking, kissing circles around it. Less suction here. Sensitivity central.
- The Shaft: Way less intense. Firm strokes using my hand with some spit while I focused up top. Like playing two instruments badly.
- The Balls & Base: Lighter touch. Just gentle pressure, licks – not the main course.
It was basically trial and error listening to tiny groans and twitches. Good noises? Keep doing that. Silence? Adjust. Wince? BACK OFF.
Step 3 – Handling the Business
The “Oh god it’s coming” moment scared me initially. Learned to relax my throat if I tried deep stuff again, or keep it near the front and just ride it out. Gentle pressure with the tongue helps manage sensitivity afterward.
The “Practice Sorta Pays Off” Phase
Didn’t happen overnight. Maybe the 5th or 6th time things finally clicked. Less like weird science, more like listening to their body’s responses.
- Found their rhythm instead of forcing my own spazzy tempo.
- Switched focus spots based on feedback – head for intensity, shaft to build it, back to head to finish.
- Stayed SUPER aware of teeth (nightmare flashbacks). Lips sealed.
- Hooked up that hand-mouth combo to actually feel synchronized.
Partner actually sighed and went “FINALLY” after one session. High praise. Didn’t feel like a total failure anymore.
Where I’m At Now (Still Learning)
Still no oral god, but the panic sweat is gone. Key takeaways cemented in my dumb skull:
- Communication is King: Asking “This good?” saved my bacon way more than pretending I knew.
- Enthusiasm Wins: Actually wanting to be there down there matters more than tricks.
- Start Gentle, Listen Hard: Slow build based on cues beats wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am.
- Don’t Forget the Hands: Shaft action helps big time, keeps things varied.
Messy process? Absolutely. Worth it? Hell yeah, once you stop sucking at it… literally. Still figuring out the “pro” tricks, but damn the basics make all the difference.
