Alright, let’s talk about this idea, “love making.” For years, honestly, I just thought it was a fancier, maybe slightly softer word for sex. You know, the physical act. That’s how most folks seemed to talk about it, or at least how I picked it up.
But then, life happens, right? You go through stuff. I remember being younger, relationships felt… well, different. More about the chase, the excitement, the physical thing itself. It was fun, sure, but looking back, something was missing. It felt kind of separate from the rest of the connection, if that makes sense.
Figuring Things Out
Things started to shift for me, I think, during a longer relationship. It wasn’t one big moment, more like a slow dawning. We went through real life together – good times, tough times, boring times. We saw each other at our best and absolute worst.
And I noticed something. Sometimes, the most profound moments weren’t necessarily the most physically intense ones. It was the stuff around it. It was:
- Holding hands while falling asleep after a long, hard day.
- That shared look across a crowded room that said, “I see you.”
- Taking care of each other when sick, no questions asked.
- The vulnerability, the trust you build piece by piece.
- Laughing together about something silly right in the middle of being close.
That’s when it clicked. The physical part became… well, an expression. An extension of everything else. It wasn’t just bodies meeting; it was the trust, the history, the shared jokes, the comfort, the acceptance, all bundled up and expressed in that physical closeness.
So, What Is It Then?
For me, now? “Love making” isn’t just the act. It’s the whole darn context. It’s about intimacy in the broadest sense. It’s showing up for someone, being vulnerable, and having that vulnerability met with care. The physical part is woven into that fabric, sometimes it’s the main pattern, other times it’s just a thread, but it’s part of the same cloth.
It stopped being about performance or just physical release and became about connection. Deep connection. It’s about saying, without words, “I’m here with you, fully, and I cherish this closeness we have.” It’s built over time, through shared experiences, not just in the bedroom, but in the kitchen, on walks, during arguments, and through forgiveness.
So yeah, it took me a while to get it. It wasn’t something I read in a book. It was just… living. Watching. Feeling. Failing sometimes, learning always. It’s less of a specific action and more of a feeling, an intention, wrapped up in that physical closeness. That’s what it means to me, anyway, after all this time.
