Okay, so yesterday I finally got around to trying one of those famous Amsterdam space cakes everyone talks about. You know, the ones with the special ingredient. My buddy Mark was visiting from out of town, insisting we had to try it. Honestly, I was kinda curious but also nervous – rules and effects seem fuzzy, pun intended.
First Stop: Confusion Central
We walked into the first coffee shop near Dam Square, saw the menu board, and immediately felt lost. Tons of names, numbers I didn’t understand. The guy behind the counter looked super busy, waving people off. Tried asking Mark what ‘Starbud’ or ‘Space Muffin’ might mean strength-wise, but he was clueless too. We kinda mumbled a question to the staff, got a quick “Start low, be patient, eat first” barked back, and panicked. Bought a pre-wrapped cake slice labeled “Choco Bliss – Mild” just to get out of there.
Back at the Apartment: The Waiting Game (And Mistakes)
Okay, plan was simple. Followed the cashier’s advice (sort of):
- Ate a big sandwich first – smart move!
- Split the single cake slice with Mark – figuring sharing one ‘Mild’ was safe.
- Sat down on the couch around 3 PM, nibbled our halves slowly. Tasted like… okay chocolate cake? Nothing crazy.
Big mistake number one? Got impatient. After 40 minutes, nothing. Felt totally normal. Mark starts saying “Dude, I think we got ripped off” or “Maybe mine’s stronger?”. Convinced ourselves we didn’t eat enough. Decided to head back out to explore.
Suddenly… Not in Kansas Anymore
Walking along a canal about an hour after eating… bam. Like a warm wave hitting from behind. Sounds got… echoey? The bikes whizzing past felt unnervingly fast and close. Looking at the canal houses, the lines started doing this weird dance. Colors felt super vibrant. Realized Mark was walking way too close to the edge and grabbed his jacket. He just giggled. “You feel it too?” Yeah, buddy.
Second mistake? Being outside. Suddenly navigating crowds and trams felt extremely complicated. Way too much sensory input. Needed quiet, now.
Rule School the Hard Way
Stumbled back to my apartment. Locked the door, drew the curtains. Total sensory overload. This is where the “local rules” became painfully clear through experience:
- Patience isn’t optional: Takes easily 60-90 minutes to really kick in. Seriously, wait.
- ONE is often enough: Especially the first time, even if labeled “Mild”.
- Home is your friend: Public spaces? Crowds? Bikes? Yeah, no. Bad idea.
- Hydrate, but snack carefully: Dry mouth? Absolutely. Got water. Thought chips would be great. Mistake number three. My mouth felt like chewing took centuries.
- Covert in public? Nope: Yeah, don’t be eating this stuff openly on a bench in the park.
The Long Landing
The peak was… intense. Just riding it out on the couch felt like an eternity. Mark passed out for a while. Music sounded amazing, then way too loud. Time meant nothing. Eventually, hours later, it slowly, slowly started fading. Made some simple soup. Still felt kinda floaty when going to bed around midnight. Woke up this morning just fine, thankfully, but holy crap, the respect level for those little cakes is sky-high now. Learned the rules the hard way!
